Last night while having some time on my hands, I was looking online for advice that I could give married couples on how to live a more Godly, and spiritually based marriage. In doing so, I found a great article at Growthtrac.com. The article I read was, Putting Your Spouse First written by Bob and Cheryl Moeller.

In the article they gave a few suggestions as to how to begin to put your spouse first in your marriage.

1. Pray together before the day begins.
"Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need" (Hebrews 4:16).

While my husband and I do not currently do this, I do make the effort every day to pray for our relationship, our family, our children, and for extended family. I personally have found that this simple action has made me concentrate on my marriage, motherhood, and my relationship with God.

2. Act out love to experience feelings of love.
"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life" (John 3:16).

Everyday, I ask myself, "What can I do today to show my husband that I love him?" I also make sure that I ask him if he needs me to do anything imparticular that day that would make his day easier. Then I follow through on both of those questions. Ensuring that not only does he hear me tell him that I love him everyday, My husband also sees my love and devotion to him in the tasks I have completed during the day.


3. Spend thirty minutes a day in a shared activity and intimate conversation.

Everyday, at the end of the day, after our daughter is in bed, We have "Adult time." During that time, we discuss things about the day, snuggle, watch tv or movie, share a special snack, or I may rub his back, or wash and rub his feet. Both of the last things, to me is also a great symbol of my submission to him as the head of our family. Also, I feel that it is a biblical way to prove my love and devotion to him, and to our marriage.

4. Give your spouse the right to access you any time day or night.

My husband knows that during the day, He can talk to me whenever he wants, and that I will listen. He can always depend on this quality of mine. While I may be having to change a diaper, or feed the baby during the conversation or discussion, my attention is also on what he is saying to me. And I am making sure he knows that I am hearing and listening to him, by asking pertinent questions and making suggestions, and even writing notes in my planner after the conversation.

5. Submit your time decisions to the fifty-year rule.

The fifty-year rule simply asks, "Fifty years from now will we be glad or regret the way we used our time today?"

My husband and I make sure that we spend our time in quality, not quantity. We make sure that we are doing things to make our marriage stronger, our family values a priority, and making sure our children know we love them and love each other.

Teach us to number our days aright,
that we may gain a heart of wisdom.
(Psalm 90:12)

This prayer is included in the article written, however, I am personally going to start using it everyday during my devotionals and prayer time to ask God assistance in my marriage.

Lord Jesus, thank You for making it so clear in Your Word that my marriage relationship is to be among my highest priorities, second only to my devotion to You. I ask You to forgive me for allowing other things to confuse that divinely ordered plan. Today let my marriage be a clear example and message to the world how much You love Your Church. Use my softened heart toward my mate as an avenue to draw people to the gospel. Let our heart connection in marriage make it easier for our children to come to a lifelong faith in You. Finally, may our home be a small foretaste of the joys of heaven. I ask this in Your Name, Lord Jesus, the One who is soon returning for us, Your bride. Amen.

Also included in the article were these questions, however, I do feel they are something that even if you do not go read the article perhaps you should see, and consider, and discuss with your spouse.

Questions for You and Your Spouse to Discuss
1. Why does the example of a loving and committed marriage have such an impact on others? What will people say was the legacy of your marriage?

2. Which of the nine reasons for keeping a soft heart impresses you most? Which of the negative consequences of a hard heart do you wish most to avoid?

3. Why does it matter that your marriage comes with an expiration date? What steps can you each take today to redeem the days you have left together?